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S1, E2: Call Her Thoughtfully Maternal - One Woman's Story of Regretting Motherhood

Tanya, a regretful mom, shares her experiences and feelings about motherhood. She initially had mixed feelings about having children but decided to have them because her husband wanted kids.

 

Tanya struggles with the role of being a mom and feels overwhelmed by the responsibilities and loss of freedom. She didn't have a strong connection with her children when they were born and experiences anxiety about their well-being. Tanya regrets not having more conversations about motherhood before having kids and wishes she had been told that it's okay to choose to be child-free. She also discusses the impact of her supportive partner and the challenges of balancing childcare and personal goals.

Matrescence is the transition from maidenhood to motherhood, similar to adolescence but for mothers. It involves a shift in identity, a loss of self, and the need to grieve the loss of dreams and experiences. The concept of matrescence should be more widely acknowledged to help contextualize the experiences of mothers and validate their feelings. It is important for young women considering motherhood to trust their instincts and validate any hesitations or concerns they may have.

Mothers should also be honest with their children about their experiences in motherhood, finding age-appropriate ways to share their feelings and guide their children through intentional choices.

 

 

Tanya's Story on Tik Tok

@kelleydaring #regretfulparents #childfree #childfreebychoice ♬ original sound - kelleydaring

 

 

Sound Bites
  • "It's just a lot, it's just a lot."
  • "You will always have existed. You will always be a person."
  • "If I had someone saying like, don't do it until you're sure."
  • "Make sure you're sure without fear mongering."
  • "Trust yourself. Your thoughts and feelings are valid and real."
  • "Mothers should be honest with their children about their experiences in motherhood."
Chapters
  • 00:00 Introduction and Background
  • 03:24 Reasons for Having Children
  • 03:55 Feelings About Kids Before Becoming a Mother
  • 06:15 The Change When Becoming a Mother
  • 09:01 The Mental Weight and Anxiety of Motherhood
  • 13:43 The Importance of a Supportive Partner
  • 35:35 The Challenges of Motherhood
  • 35:57 Exploring Matrescence
  • 52:51 Validating Women's Feelings and Trusting Oneself
  • 01:04:43 Supporting and Empowering Women in Motherhood

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