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S1E5: Call Her Honestly Regretful - One Mother's Story of Regretting Motherhood

"Jennifer" is a regretful mother who has chosen to remain anonymous. 

Jennifer, a mother of five, shares her experience of motherhood and the feelings of regret she has encountered along the way. She discusses how her perspective on motherhood shifted from a negative view to excitement when she saw the heartbeats of her twins during an ultrasound. Jennifer talks about the guilt she feels as a mother and the judgment she faced when expressing her regrets. She describes the daily challenges and responsibilities of being a mother, including the constant worry and lack of personal time. Jennifer also explains how motherhood has taken over her life and how her thoughts are always focused on her children.

 

 

In this conversation, the guest discusses the challenges and regrets she has experienced as a mother. She talks about the constant worry and mental load that comes with motherhood, as well as the sacrifices she has made for her children. She also shares the positive aspects of motherhood, including how it has made her a better person. The guest emphasizes the importance of women sharing their experiences and supporting one another. She hopes that people understand that regretful mothers don't regret their children, but rather the experiences and circumstances surrounding motherhood. She would go back and have children again, but would strive to be in a better position to provide for them. The guest plans to have open and honest conversations with her children about the challenges of parenthood when they are old enough.

 

Takeaways

  • Motherhood can bring about feelings of regret and guilt, even for those who love their children deeply.
  • The responsibilities and challenges of motherhood can be overwhelming, leaving little time for personal pursuits.
  • Mothers often feel a constant worry and a sense of always being needed by their children.
  • Society's expectations and judgment can contribute to feelings of regret and isolation for mothers.
  • Motherhood can change a person's perspective and priorities, leading to a shift in their identity and sense of self. Motherhood comes with constant worry and a heavy mental load.
  • Regretful mothers don't regret their children, but rather the experiences and circumstances surrounding motherhood.
  • Motherhood has the potential to make a person a better version of themselves.
  • Women should share their experiences and support one another in order to break the cycle of judgment.
  • Open and honest conversations about the challenges of parenthood are important for future parents.

 

Sound Bites

  • "I don't think that any 25 year old has any business getting married."
  • "I fell into the trap of thinking that I was gonna be different."
  • "Oh no, you shouldn't be having kids."
  • "The worry doesn't go just cause I displaced myself. So you're absolutely right. I don't have autonomy over my thoughts anymore. It's shared. It's theirs."
  • "Motherhood quite literally made me a better person."
  • "I attribute all of that to them. I wanted to be better because they deserve the best."

 

Chapters

00:00 Introduction and Background
02:48 The Shift in Perspective on Motherhood
07:58 Feelings of Regret and Guilt
11:40 The Impact of Society's Expectations and Judgment
13:46 The Daily Challenges and Responsibilities of Motherhood
25:20 Motherhood Taking Over One's Life
34:33 The Power of Women and the Importance of Support
39:18 Understanding Regretful Mothers
48:36 Reflecting on Motherhood and Future Conversations

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